I bared my heart in my last post. It was a sincere one. I wanted to let you know that I’m not a SuperMom or a Super HomeschoolMom always with her red cape on. There are actually many times in our homeschool journey that I am just as lost and vulnerable as other moms are out there.
I received a feedback from my friend and art playmate (Yes, I do have a playmate!), Dette Ramos of Bananabellieboo, on my last post. She told me that what I shared triggered a loooong discussion between her and her husband on how they could also encourage their young kids to dream for themselves and how they want to be able to support them in their dreams. I was surprised when she told me that it actually took them about one whole hour just talking about it from her office to their house!
It made think how Mike and I started “dreaming” with Arielle and Kayla. To be honest, I can’t seem to clearly recall what we did first or when the dreaming phase all started because to me, their growing up years, especially when they were toddlers, were more of just teaching them basic skills, making them wonder how and why things work they way they do, and checking if they are actually enjoying whatever they’re doing and interested to doing more.
Let me just share what I vividly recall doing with Arielle and Kayla when they were still very young and we were all trying to discover their potentials, talents, gifts, preferences, and inclinations.
I surrounded them with a lot of books, magazines, and newspapers. That’s one thing for sure. Picture books, storybooks, chapter books, coloring books, activity books! I remember I was able to take a video of Arielle with a book upside down in her hands, babbling on and on as she pretended to be reading the book she was holding 🙂 We noticed, on the other hand, that Kayla grew up liking Almanacs. She would look forward going to National Bookstore or Fully Booked and buy the new almanac that comes out every year. This mere observation made me see the personalities of our two girls. One prefers lengthy books and that would be Arielle, while the other prefers bite-size chunks of information (Kayla).
It is through books and a lot of reading and printed materials that Arielle and Kayla were able to “see more” than what’s around them, explore possibilities, and express their thoughts and feelings after reading and having a casual conversation with them.
2. Arts and Crafts
Being and arts-and-crafts person myself, it wouldn’t be a surprise that I also exposed Arielle and Kayla to a lot of cutting and pasting, drawing, painting, lots of paper, crayons, markers, pencils, paint, etc.! Doing art activities was one way of discovering more of who they are through the images they drew, the colors and strokes they used. Art, being a visual and tactile activity, was a self-expression activity that I was able to use to know more about Arielle and Kayla in their younger years. As they grew older, I saw all the more, through their works and time spent in the activities, that Arielle’s interest in arts was becoming more pronounced and Kayla wasn’t as much into it.
3. Music and Theatre
Music has been part of their lives as early as probably when they were 4 to 6 months old when they were still in my belly. I had headphones on my tummy with classical music on for them to listen to, and I remember playing the classic children’s songs (still in cassette tapes!) when we would play in the living room, when we would take afternoon naps, or when we would ride in the car.
We also watched musical plays for their entertainment value and a trip to the theatre was what made us discover that Arielle had this “dream” of performing on stage…as the lead role! Yup! We watched Peter Pan at CCP in 2007 and Arielle said, “I can see myself on stage doing the main character.” She was watching at the edge of her seat (I’m not kidding!) the entire time! And true enough, the next year, at 8 years old, she bravely tried out performing arts for the first time. She took a summer theatre workshop and she loved it! She landed the lead role (as Jack in Jack in the Beanstalk) in the workshop’s production and we knew that the stage was “part of her world” (as the Little Mermaid would sing it 🙂 ) A year after, she did “A Christmas Carol” professionally and it was one experience she’ll never ever forget! It gave her the confidence to try out audition after audition, go to callbacks and open auditions) and even if she didn’t make it to the cast, it was still a dream for her to show to others what she can do and what she’s got.
We also convinced Kayla to try out theatre since she saw her Ate enjoying it immensely. So she did too at age 7 and played one of the main characters, Pinocchio, in a summer workshop. She confidently performed on stage, but she herself said that she liked it, but it’s not her thing.
4. Sports, Physical/Kinesthetic Activities
When we shifted to homeschooling, competitive swimming has been their P.E. They did it for 5 years. They got tired of it and found themselves trying archery and golf. I admit that at times I still wish they stayed on with swimming but I know that even if they didn’t stick with the sport, they have learned the discipline in training for a sport and the other character traits that they have developed while at it like obedience, perseverance, working with team members, humility, among others.
Now that Kayla’s liking golf again (Thanks to Mike who is also playing again after giving up on it for a while), I see that this could be her “dream”. Although she may not fully admit YET that golf is a dream of hers, I see that she’s BEGINNING to realize that this is a strength of hers, after being given positive feedbacks on how she plays the sport, and that this could actually open doors for her to somewhere we don’t know yet. Kayla is also currently at the stage where she is starting to question what she really wants to do in her life. Knowing that her Ate Arielle clearly knows what she wants to take up in college and what she really wants to do, Mike and I can sense that she is beginning to search for her unique path and calling in life. So for now, we are here to support her in a strength of hers that is obvious and hopefully, it will really take her to bigger dreams.
Prior to golf, we thought that she wanted to do cook and bake. That she wanted to take the culinary path when the time comes. We enrolled her in summer cooking classes. We tried recipes at home. We baked cookies, cakes, and cupcakes. We bought her cookbooks and encouraged her to print out recipes she would like to try and keep a file of them. But again, her interest in it wasn’t sustained although she still likes to work in the kitchen.
Another worthwhile activity we do as a family when we have the finances and time to do it is travel locally and abroad. It is through first-hand experience of other culture and lifestyle that our girls learn for themselves what they would want to change in their own way of life and how they would want to live their own lives when they go to college and after. Seeing for themselves how other people do their day-to-day activities in another place or country teaches them to think of better ways to do things and improve systems. It is a way of dreaming for themselves and for our country. It also opens their eyes to opportunities that may not be available to them in Manila or in the Philippines, making them dream bigger and bolder. It was when we went to the U.S. and Singapore that we all dreamed with Arielle in taking up Animation and being an animator someday!
6. Meet other people
Of course, as we were doing all these activities…buying books, doing arts and crafts, watching musicals, enrolling in workshops and classes, traveling to places, we were able to give Arielle and Kayla the opportunities to meet other people in their natural settings who, in one way or another, were able to inspire and encourage them. What can beat SOCIALIZING with REAL PEOPLE from different professions, from different fields, and from all ages?
So you see, encouraging our girls to dream involves a number of things:
1. a hands-on and intentional parenting
2. a discovery process which includes trial-and-error; It really is exposing your children to VARIED activities and finding out in the process which ones they are wired to do or where their potentials are.
3. influencing them by our (parents’) own interests at the onset of or during the discovery process, but not dictating to them
4. having faith in God, our Maker, who designed each one of us with a unique purpose, who ultimately knows what we are cut out for and who can make dreams come true
The words of Pope Francis when he visited our country a few weeks ago are still fresh in my mind. He stressed how important it is to dream in the family. It was truly an affirmation of our decision and chosen lifestyle to homeschool our children because it is in homeschooling that we are all able to dream as a family and support one another in our dreams.
What are your and your children’s dreams? How do you hold on to and pursue them as a family?