I feel my brain is being squeezed to the max. Too much thinking. Intense planning. Can’t-help worrying. Since Arielle graduated from high school last April, I’ve been helping her out during this gap year of hers. Daily animation workshop for ten weeks, internships, other workshops, portfolio preparation, resume making, online chat sessions with SCAD-HK, home management and chores teaching. And I thought we could take everything really slow and relaxed during this gap year. It turns out this gap year is more serious and more intense!
Add to that having no helper for three months now. That means more duties for me: menu planning, grocering, doing a freezer inventory, cooking, washing the dishes, pots, and pans, sweeping, and cleaning-as-you go (which I feel takes all day!). I’m just so thankful that our helper back home in the province is doing our weekly laundry and ironing of clothes. But my duties do not end there. I am also the driver of Arielle to her Monday to Thursday workshop from 8 am to 12 noon and of Kayla to her Tuesday and Thursday golf training from 8 am to 11 am. That means having to wake up everyday at 5 am to prepare our breakfast and make sure we are out of the house by 7 am to avoid the morning rush, (but end up in one almost everyday). Most of the time, I don’t go back home anymore when I take the girls to their workshop and golf training. I wait for them at a nearby Starbucks or at the clubhouse and try to be as productive as I can be with my laptop, iPad, or art materials. By the time we all get back home in the afternoon, I go straight to the kitchen marinating some dish for dinner or cooking rice already.
This week, I decided to ask our academic consultant if TMA, our homeschool provider, will be offering Grades 11 and 12 to homeschoolers, after hearing some news that they won’t be allowed anymore by the Department of Education with the new K-12 program being rolled out already to the education sector. Well, I got my answer. She said that for now, TMA can’t offer homeschooling for Grades 11 and 12 because of “the technicalities in the requirements of DepEd.” It wasn’t further explained to me and I didn’t bother to ask more questions.
I honestly am not 100% confident with the K-12 implementation by DepEd. Well, that’s my honest opinion. So when I found out where TMA stands in the K-12 program, I immediately posted a question in our Facebook group and searched online for homeschooling programs that Kayla could switch to. She has told me several times that she likes to continue being homeschooled and would not want to go back to traditional school. All the more now when she herself said that she would like to give golf another chance and take it more seriously in preparation for college.
I haven’t found a program yet for Kayla for her Grades 11 and 12, in case we do have to transfer her somewhere else. I’ve found a few sites online but I still need to read more about them and send initial inquiries. For now, we would like to continue our current set up where we could choose our own books and materials and Kayla to work at her own time and pace. All we need is support and professional record-keeping in terms of grades, transcript, and college preparation and application.
I think you can clearly imagine what my brain has been going through lately. It’s not only about college but also, Kayla’s homeschool path particularly for Grades 11 and 12! Brain-racking, isn’t it?
If only I could see the future and tell as early as now if we would really be able to send Arielle to SCAD-HK…
If only I could already know if Arielle will be granted scholarships…
If only I could find out as soon as possible if DepEd would allow TMA to continue their homeschooling program until Grade 12…
If only I could see Kayla excelling in her golf and doors of opportunities opening up for her in the sport…
It’s really been physically taxing and mentally vexing lately. God knows the planner and organizer that I am. Thinking about the girls’ future feels like being in a tunnel and seeing a ray of light at the end, but in order to eventually see and be in the light, I have to go through the dark. Oh! IF ONLY!
In my prayers, I ask God to SHOW me clearly where Arielle is going to end up for college. Where and how Kayla will be in the next four years of her homeschooling. I keep on asking God to guide our steps to make sure we don’t miss out a step, a deadline, or an opportunity. I continue to make plans and do my best to be intentional in our parenting and in the education of our girls. But in the end, I can only do so much and it is still God’s plan that would prevail:
Proverbs 19:21 – Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.
I just hope that as I do all these planning, our plans are not far from what the Lord wants us to do. Or if in case they do stray from His plans, we would be quick enough to realize them and realign ourselves with God.